Choices
by Kisaragi Yuu
Summary: [Chapter 2 Uploaded] Ken and Omi were brothers and they both fell into a same man - Aya. Omi was weak and Ken was sacrificing his own happiness, but could he really deny the fact that his love to Aya was growing? [Yaoi][Ken x Aya, Omi x Aya]
1. Default Chapter

Ugh, not in the mood of comedy... really sorry about the Aries Gakuen chapters minna, will finish chap 6 sometime later when I'll be in the funny mood *sighs* anyway, here's a new story. Full of angst though, but I still hope for enjoyments and comments! ^_^ so please, comments, anybody?

Warnings: Shonen-ai, angst  
Spoilers: None  
Disclaimer: Weiß doesn't belong to me 

**Choices**  
Chapter 0 - Prologue  
Kisaragi Yuu 

_I've promised to make you my bride   
So that is what I'll fulfil_

"Ken-niisan!" 

"Ah, Omi!" 

Ken smiled to his younger brother. The blonde blue-eyed boy with a soccer ball hemmed on his slim arm approached the elder by running. Ken's eyes widened as Omi's face suddenly changed as like he was in great deal of pain. 

"Omi!!" he cried as the small figure lost his balance and almost fell crashing on the solid field when a redhead young man held him. Omi looked up to see his savior, and it was someone that he was already very familiar with: Aya. 

"Aya... thanks." Ken sighed in relief as he hurried to the duo. 

The boy with chocolate orbs threw a glare at his brother, "What's that all about? You know the best that your heart is not strong enough to pump up with running! Are you trying to commit suicide?!" 

"B-but..." As like threatening tears to fall, Omi's eyes became as big as saucers. "I wanted to be with you as fast as I can, is that a wrong thing to do?" 

A mental 'aww' was scattering in the air. Aya smiled softly to the small boy. 

"Omi," Aya's voice was deep and calm, "Your brother is very worried about you. If there were something wrong with you, he'd be blaming himself to death. Now you don't want your dearest brother to blame himself for your sickness, do you?" 

"No..." 

"Then listen to what he says, don't do things that your heart doesn't allow you to do. Understand?" 

"Yes..." 

"Good boy." 

Aya smiled a little again as he helped Omi to adjust his body and stood straight. The brown haired boy glanced over the two of them with weak smile on his lips, as like forcing himself to be happy. A feeling in his heart was aching everytime he saw Aya smiled that kind of smile to his own brother... a feeling called 'love' maybe. Thus he always ripped over that kind of feeling off him forcefully – although sometimes it meant pain. 

/Omi is my brother and he is very weak. While Aya is our childhood friend who Omi adores./ 

He knew that there was no special space between them that he could fit in. So what could he do was just to play his role of a great brother and childhood friend to the two who were precious for him. 

And he liked it so far. 

He had decided that no matter what, he'd choose over Omi's happiness than his own. They've lost their parents and they only had each other to hung on to. Both had to take care of the others, it was something that they had promised over their parents' graves. Because of that, he buried his own egoism deep into the corner of his heart. 

"Ken-kun?" 

He was snapped out of his reverie with that dainty voice. "Ken-kun, what are you doing? Let's go back to home, Momoe-san is waiting for us and I'm very hungry!" The blonde said naively. 

"A-Aa." Ken replied with a little too-tiny voice. 

Although his brother noticed the strange tone but he didn't bother to ask for it. Instead he went off to their house together with Aya slowly. Omi just smiled to his brother and asked him to go faster. 

Bitterly, he forced yet again another smile. And in the same time, ripped over another feeling. 

_But why does this promise   
Suddenly become a burden on my fingers? _

*** 

"Thanks for the meal!" 

The four boys who ate up their meals thanked the grandma who took care of them a lot, Momoe-san. The old lady just quirked a smile as she took up the dishes, but was stopped suddenly by Omi who took them from her hands. "Let me do it!" 

"Omi-chan..." Momoe-san smiled warmly to her grandchild. 

Ken was going to take over the dishes when Aya stood up from his chair and took half of the dishes on Omi's hands without a word. Thus eyes were like saying 'don't, just let me do this' to the youngest boy. 

"Aya-kun, it's really okay... I can handle this." 

But Aya didn't reply, he headed to the kitchen straight forwardly while Omi was still standing in the dining room. 

Ken whistled to his brother, making him to gasp in surprise. "What are you daydreaming for? Go and follow him to the kitchen! Who knows you might have the chance to wash the dishes with him too?" Ken winked to the angelic faced boy. He blushed an unison of red and pink at that. Soon enough, he went as what his brother said after scowling some words of protests. 

Yohji, the oldest boy between them and was Ken's best friend, shoved a 'look' to his friend. "What was that all about?" 

"Huh?" 

"Don't play dumb, *that*." 

"What? I don't know what you mean." 

"Hmph, the 'who knows you might have the chance to wash the dishes with him too' *that*! Why in the world are you doing it?!" 

"Am I wrong? We know the best that Omi adores Aya more than just childhood friends, why are you getting so angry because I want to encourage him??" Ken's voice rose as he saw what was this going to. 

The wavy haired blonde was irritated, "Ken! How can you be so stupid?! He's your *rival*, for God's sake!! And you're not suppose to-" 

Ken cut him off by dragging the taller boy to the outside of the house into the garden. 

"Yohji! Not in the house!" he hissed. 

"Ken, I know how do you feel about Aya. It was so plain to see that with a glimpse of look, I've already noticed it. And I do understand that you can't express your feelings to Aya that easily since, well let's face it, he is a cold bastard with a stick shoved up into his ass. But what I couldn't figure out is why in the hell are you helping your own rival?!" 

Ken flushed, "W-what do you mean, I don't have feelings for Aya. He's a childhood friend and I respect him for being such a caring person to my brother! That's all!" 

"Your eyebrows are twitching, that means you are lying." He pointed a finger on the middle of Ken's eyebrows, the brunette gasped as another blush came upon him, "C'mon Ken, admit it. You too are also in love with Aya." 

"...Yohji, don't." 

"What DON'T?! Ken, I've had enough looking at your lonely eyes whenever you see Aya being a little too-nice to your dearest brother. Why can't you be honest to yourself?! And stop being such a masochist! You deserve happiness as much as your brother does." 

Ken bit his lips, did he? Did he deserve happiness? 

"...Omi is in love with Aya... and this time he's serious. I can't do anything else than to support him." 

"Ken, it means you sacrifice your own happiness to have your brother's happiness. It's a stupid thing to do." 

Ken smiled bitterly, "Yes, it's a stupid thing to do indeed. But Omi is more miserable than I am, he was born with a very weak body. He can't even run! Have you ever imagined what will happen to him if his first love becomes his brother's lover?" 

Yohji clenched his fists as he looked away. He knew something like this would come up. Eventually. 

Another bitter smile slipped up upon the brunette's lips, "That's what I meant... I don't have choices but to give up. I've forced Aya to promise me that he'll make Omi his 'bride' too afterall... and he said yes. It's the best thing to do anyway." 

Silence overwhelmed them as leafs started to fall and wind blew upon his garden. Yes, there was no choice but to bury his own feelings deep inside him. Letting it to be forgotten, letting to be a sweet memory to remember in his old days. Although little by little, shred by shred, his love kept growing to the dearest silent redhead, but stabbing it with a knife was what he could do to kill it. 

He had chose his blood relative's happiness over his own, and now he had to face with the consequences. Painful wounds and cries all hidden under his pillow, it was another cold day in October. 

And in that day, a heart had made its tearful decision. 

_Eventhough I long for it   
It's something that I'll never touch   
Eventhough I want it so much   
It's something that I'll run away from _

_Eventhough I love you so...   
You are somewhere unreachable in this trance of eternity _

The End – Prologue 

To Be Continued to Chapter 01 


	2. Happiness

Warnings: Shonen-ai, angst  
Spoilers: None  
Disclaimer: Weiß doesn't belong to me

**Choices**  
Chapter 01 - Happiness  
Kisaragi Yuu 

After the 'chat' Yohji and him occurred yesterday, it wasn't a big surprise that they didn't talk from the morning up till now. 

Ken tried to sleep in the night before, he really did. But he just couldn't get some sleep. Whenever he closed his eyes, the image of Aya smiling tenderly at Omi came splashing on his blurry mind. And he didn't like it at all. 

That made two reasons to get grumpy. Just great. 

"Ken-kun! Earth calling Ken-kun!" 

/Huh?/ The soccer player looked to the source of voice. 

"Ken-ku~n! You've been acting very strange lately, you daydream a lot more often than you always do. The portion of the sighs that slipped out of your lips is uncountable! Ken-kun? What's happening with you? Are you sick? Are you tired? Are you okay?" 

Omi kept raining Ken with questions over questions. The older boy just couldn't help himself not to smile at his brother's act. 

"I'm okay Omi, just one of those stupid aspirin pills... they've turned me into a nocturnal creature." Ken simply lied. 

The blonde sighed, "those aspirins don't help. Maybe you should try another medication? Can you walk?" 

Ken laughed, "Omi, don't be silly. It was just a plain headache, it's not something to worry about. I can walk, and very properly too. Do you need me to prove that to you?" he teased as he stood up. Omi giggled at that. 

"Don't force yourself too much." 

Coffee eyes looked to the crimson ones. 

Aya's face was impassive, and the tone was very straight – not like the tone he always used to Omi... but Ken felt a funny warmth on his tummy. The grumble inside it was gone just because Aya stated something perfectly simple like that. Love was funny. 

He didn't notice that a blush painted his cheeks red. 

And he also didn't notice that a certain blonde realized that he was blushing for a second there. 

A few seconds after that, Omi started yapping again. "Ken-kun? Aya-kun and I are going into the ski resort near Yamada Mountain around here. And I was thinking if you and Yohji-kun could come along with us..." 

Ken bit his lips at the word 'us'. 

"I don't know... things have been pretty hard around here and I really don't want anything else other than sleeping and get some rest... maybe sometime later?" 

He knew that it was just an excuse to not see them together. Eventhough Ken's patience and toleration to the relationship in front of him was wide but there was actually limit to everything. That didn't exclude the pain he could afford. 

"B-but Ken-kun, it won't be fun without you!" 

A curve on his lips. 

"Then it's Aya's and Yohji's job to make it fun even without me. Really sorry, Omi, but I really feel like spending the whole day in the bed. Do tell me stories when you get back okay?" 

"But..." 

"C'mon Omi, he already said that he didn't want to go. Don't force him." A calm voice chimed in. 

The brown-eyed boy looked to the voice and smiled bitterly, as thanking the redhead wordlessly. 

"I'm not coming either." 

Everybody in the room turned their heads to the source of the voice—Yohji. Ken's eyes widened at the simple statement. 

"Why?" That one didn't come out from Omi though, it came from a certain soccer player. 

"Don't feel like it. I don't want to interrupt lovers' time together." Yohji said simply as he smiled teasingly to Omi, but in the same time sending a 'look' to Ken. Ken looked away. 

"Y-Yohji-kun! Don't say that!" Omi's innocent blush rose. 

"Haha, well just enjoy yourselves. I'll take care of your stupid bro okay? Don't worry and have fun, it's good for your health. When are you leaving?" the lanky playboy asked. 

"Tomorrow." Aya answered. 

"Hey you gotta be ready then, now go and prepare!" 

"Okay Yohji-kun, thankies. Ken-kun, sure you don't wanna come?" 

Ken smiled, "it's okay. Have fun 'kay? Aya, I trust my brother to you okay?" 

"I will protect him." 

There was a short silence on that as quietly Ken's heart was scratched again. He managed to bring up a fake smile as he shoo-ed Aya and Omi away. There was only Yohji and him in the room that night. 

The wind was cold, and the small branches of the tree planted beside their flowershop were hitting the windows gently. Rattles were heard but in the same time the silence was overwhelming. That was the point where Ken couldn't take it anymore. 

"So, mind explaining to me why you choose not to go?" Ken asked, trying hard not to sound opposing or something. The last thing he ever wanted now was a fight with Yohji over something not connected with the playboy at all. 

"Like I said, I don't feel like it." Came the cold statement. 

"Oh? I thought you like vacation? By the way, you want some coffee?" Ken rose as he made his way to the kitchen to get a cup of milk coffee—Aya's favorite which became his favorite too in a while. 

Yohji followed the brunette to the kitchen, he let his shoulder bone rested on the doorsill as he crossed both of his arms and legs. He looked to the person in front of him and watched him as he made a poured down hot water in the red cup he was holding. 

"Aya likes milk coffee." 

Silence. 

"Really? It's my fave too you know, talking about coincidence. Anyways, do you want a cup too or not?" Ken replied, hiding his shaky hand. 

"Sure." 

"What flavor?" 

"Black." 

"Got you, wait a min." the brunette said simply as he reached to get another sachet of instant coffee. The one that was black of course. He was oblivious of the burning stare behind him but he chose not to ponder on it. The headache was killing him and he really didn't have the strength to argue about anything anymore. 

Then as he ripped off the sachet, a warm pair of hands hold his own cold fingers from the back. 

Ken felt a sudden blush on his cheeks. 

"You are shaking." 

"I-I caught a flu..." 

The sachet on Ken's cold fingers fell down and the contain was scattered everywhere. Thus Yohji's hands didn't show any sign that they were going to let Ken's hands go. 

"Y-Yohji, let me clean the coffee or—" 

"Why?" 

Chocolate orbs looked up and saw sorrowful jaded ones... but he couldn't stop himself to think why was Yohji seemed to suffer a lot more than he did? 

"Why do you have to sacrifice your own happiness over your brother's happiness?" 

Ken bit his lips, "we talked about this, didn't we?" 

"Still I couldn't stop wondering why." 

"Yohji... Omi is the only family I got left, I care about him more than I care about myself. Isn't it obvious that I really want him to be happy? Omi's body is very weak too, the last thing I want to see is him suffering because of this indefinite feelings of mine." 

The hands clenched stronger. 

"The last thing you want to see is that, or Aya become engaged to Omi whatsoever?" 

He kept quiet, "Yohji... let go of my hands." 

"No." 

"Yohji..." 

"No." 

"Yohji!" 

"Ken! Why is it have to be Omi? What did you do so wrong that you deserve this kind of punishment?! Why in the hell it gotta be Aya that you're in love with?!" Yohji snapped.

"I don't know!" Ken snapped back as he tried damn hard not to let the tears go out. "Then let me ask you back, why are you so concerned with this?! This has nothing to do with you! Just stay out of this!!" 

"I can't." 

"Why not?!" Ken was hysterical, he was just starting to lose his temper since he didn't understand anything anymore. 

Emerald green eyes looked down, it was a sincere look and Ken felt something different from the man in front of him. As like buying time, Yohji bit his own lips gently as he answered the question. The answer that changed everything. 

"Because I love you." 

Silence. 

Ken looked to Yohji's eyes as his mouth was still opened and he just couldn't get it closed. 

Looking at the boy, he repeated himself without losing his grip on Ken's hands, "I love you. That's why I can't turn away my head from this matter since it involved you and your feelings, which are important for me although it seemed to lose their meaning to you." 

"B-But I..." he talked in a hush as he found his voice back. Suddenly he felt his throat was wearing dry. 

"I know. And I'm not asking for an answer, thus just like how you want Omi to be happy, I want you to be happy too. You deserve the same happiness with Omi, which is why I don't like the idea Omi is happy and you're not. 

He looked up to Yohji, the playboy didn't show any sign that he was joking at all. 

Then he looked down, lost to Yohji's honesty. Deep in the corner of his heart, he envied Yohji for his honesty. He wished he could be as half as brave as him. 

"I'm serious about this. I'm not expecting for an answer but I do believe I can treat you better than Aya." 

Ken felt a sting on his heart by the name 'Aya'. 

"I really don't know..." 

Yohji looked over the boy in front of him before he gently let his hands go, instead he grabbed Ken's shoulders with a gentleness that bewitched Ken a little. Jade eyes stared straight to the brown ones as Yohji drew himself closer to Ken. Ken's heart started to bump a little bit louder. 

Then he kissed his forehead. 

Ken blushed, as he felt Yohji's lips and was so surprised that they were soft and warm. As Yohji unattached his lips from Ken, he completely let go of the Siberian and took a step back as he whispered, "think about it." 

His lips curved into a faint smile to Ken as he cleaned the fallen sachet and went out of the kitchen. 

Ken felt his limbs were taken away from him as he let himself fell and sat on the floor. He touched his own forehead and still could feel Yohji's gentleness and warmness on the simple small spot. 

"I don't know..." he whispered to himself. 

"Aya." Came the voice of Yohji from the outside of the kitchen. 

Ken felt he was just struck by a thunder as he froze. Then Yohji's voice chimed again, "since when were you standing in there?" 

"Just now." Aya's deep voice replied. 

Ken rushed out of the kitchen and saw Aya, but without Omi. Aya seemed to forget something and came back to get it, but he saw everything, Ken thought. /He saw everything./ He felt a sudden chill to his own body. 

"Did you see and hear everything?" Yohji asked, his tone was flat. 

"No." Aya's tone was just as flat as Yohji. "It has nothing to do with me anyway, it's up to you guys." He simply stated again as he made his way out of the flowershop, leaving a note that he wanted Ken to lock up the flowershop. 

Yohji's fists were clenching as like stabbing his own skin, then he turned to Ken. 

Yohji widened his eyes. 

Ken was standing still, his face was impassive but tears flew out from his eyes. Fresh tears, lips parted, but nothing came out from those lips. Yohji felt a stab on his heart. 

"Ken..." 

He called his name softly but the brunette didn't say anything. Thus the silent tears kept flowing. The lanky playboy made his way to the brunette and held him tight. 

"Yes Yohji..." he asked in a whisper, "why does it have to be Aya...?" 

It was another night in the busy city of Tokyo, and the wind was blowing coldly. Thus no matter how cold it got, it could never freeze a wounded heart. 

TBC~ 


	3. Decision

Warnings: Shonen-ai, angst  
Spoilers: None  
Disclaimer: Weiß doesn't belong to me, nor the song 'It's too Late', nice lyric, I tell you

Note: Yeah, the lyric I used in this fanfic is the same translation lyric for "It's Too Late", those who never heard this song just gotta hear it! This is the second Ending Song for the old Weiß Kreuz anime, not the Glühen thingy ; fits the situation if you ask me ;) got this from

**Choices  
**Chapter 02 – Decision  
Kisaragi Yuu

_Like the flames I lost you to, sadness overwhelms me too  
__The cold rain sends shivers down to my spine and slips into my memory  
__Who was it that loved you so? Who was it that hated you so?  
__I gasp in pain—the memories begin to swirl inside my mind_

Whenever Ken tried to shut his eyes, he always started to imagine his own brother. The brother that he loved so much he would sacrifice everything—including his own feelings. Ken never thought it would be this hard. Ken never thought that his feelings would start to be unbearable like this. He never thought about it.

But how Aya acted so cold to him just made him realize that the redhead's presence to Ken's heart was more than anything in this world.

Was it even more than Omi's presence?

No... he wouldn't dare to think like that.

He didn't care if he was a masochist, he didn't care if he had to pretend for the rest of his life. He just wanted to see Omi gained his own happiness, because he really deserved it. He deserved it better than anyone else in this world.

"Mornin'."

Ken tilted his head from his bed when his best friend came into his room, a mug filled with hot vanilla cream milk on his hand. The brunette managed to smile but Yohji could see the heavy bags around his eyes, he had been crying all night and it was easy to guess.

"Thought you'd like some hot drink in this cold morning."

"Un."

The playboy Weiß placed himself just next to the smaller one as he passed him the milk. Ken shifted his position a little bit better so that he could drink it without any difficulties, as he took the olive green mug—Yohji's favorite—he took a small sip. The taste of sweet vanilla echoed within his tongue, but somehow he still could feel a little bit of bitterness on the corner of his mouth. He tried not to think about it so much.

"It's hot."

"Of course, if it's cold then you should be afraid."

Ken snickered. Yohji always could find things to joke around in the worst moments, that was one of his attributes that Ken admired so much. He wished he could be as playful as him, he wished he could be as strong as Yohji who could even joke when he was shot almost to death. Yohji was very strong and he never showed the world his weakness. He wondered if the lanky lad had ever felt 'loneliness'.

"Gee, just look to the sky. I wonder if Momoe-chan needs help in the laundry."

"Yeah, it's going to be furious. Maybe you should help," the brunette paused, "and cut the 'chan' adding, she's over 60!" (1)

"Heh, women will be always women although she's old." Yohji winked.

Ken snickered again, "you are impossible."

"The tattoo says it all." (2)

He paused for awhile before he continued, "yep maybe I really should help after all, we'll be starving if she's sick." As Yohji got up from the bed, he faced Ken with his back. He waved his right hand as he headed to the door, and stopped there. As though frozen. Ken plastered him with his eyes, his eyebrows lifted when Yohji suddenly turned to him again, walked to him and stared at him straightly with his jade green eyes.

"Ken."

"Y-yes?" he was shuddered by the flatness and the naked tone of Yohji. Somehow his honey-dew coloured hair seems so beautiful today, maybe because it's going to rain soon. Ken never knew.

"About yesterday," he started.

Ken slightly blushed but he managed to keep his eyes plastered on the jade ones.

"I... just want to tell you that I was serious. And you don't have to answer me, confessing my feelings is already more than enough," he paused for awhile, "I'm sorry if I make it difficult to you yesterday, I don't know what was I thinking. But believe me, seeing you sad just totally breaks me down and I don't want to see you like this anymore."

Ken lowered his eye level, this was getting too much. He had been a spoiled friend over Yohji and the playboy still treated him as though he was something precious. He didn't deserve Yohji's kindness, he was too kind.

"I guess... after losing Asuka and everything, I kinda forgot how to really love somebody so I was frustrated. But now after I've confessed, I feel so much better. I'm sorry for my egoism, I know who you really want to be with now and I don't blame you. So... take it easy, kay?"

Suddenly the soccer player noticed how Yohji managed to smile, but his smile was indescribable that he didn't know how to put it in words. It was a smile full of bitterness, sadness and relief, but only the eyes that caught Ken's attention the most. It was the look when somebody had given up, given up on something that he held dear the most. At that time, Ken knew that Yohji was as serious as he could be. And it clenched his heart.

"Okay..." that was the only word that Ken could manage to let out when his throat was wearing dry.

"Good. Take a day-off today, kay? It's going to be stormy and you know how customers are when it's stormy." He winked playfully to the brunette, only this time, Ken didn't manage to smile back.

"Just get some rest, when you feel to eat, go down and tell Momoe-chan." Yohji smiled tenderly as he patted Ken on his head and went out of the room.

When the door was closed, Ken felt totally alone. Shut down from the world and being the only human in this whole wide planet. But he was able not to run to Yohji and forced him to be his companion because Ken knew for the best that it would hurt them both. Especially when he was still in love with Aya.

He looked outside to the world and he saw no pedestrian. Maybe it was because the sky was growing furious.

This was loneliness that he felt.

He realized that he was still holding the mug which resembled Yohji very much. The scent of vanilla sipped to his nose as he took another small sip to the hot drink. He savored the moment of sweetness in his mouth for awhile.

"This is really sweet..."

He mumbled to himself as tears trailed down his cheeks again. It could be so much easier if only he had loved Yohji, it could be so much easier if only Yohji didn't love him and treated him kindly like this, it could be so much easier if only...

...if only he didn't love Aya.

Then he cried, letting his façade to drift away along with his tears. Showing not even a single living thing to see him vulnerable like this, it was just too much to bear. Then after this he would feel better, and maybe he could face the world without so much sadness in his heart anymore. He wouldn't be a total hypocrite if he let himself free this time and tried better next time.

But the only thing that Ken didn't notice was that Yohji was standing just outside of the room, letting himself to hear Ken's cry over the small gap on the door which he didn't close completely on purpose.

His cry slashed Yohji's heart, but he needed to know this. He took a cigarette out of his pocket and looked to the scenery in front of him, painted with gray sky monochrome. He smoked his cigarette. Then drip by drip, came along the rain. It wasn't furious at first, but as though steps, it got worse. When Yohji realized it, he was already staring at the rain as though looking at an angel crying his heart out. The sky was crying, along with his own angel behind this door.

"Damn rain."

_Should I believe in what we did then?  
__And if I do, leave you behind and feel regret again?  
__Is this the way to say good bye, love?  
__When you and I had promises yet to fulfill?_

---

It was past the heavy rain and drizzling when Ken opened his eyes again on his bed. He laid there for a moment and savored the moment of comforting coldness in his bed before he got up and sat on it. He looked outside, it was drizzling. The sky was getting calmer and it should stop raining pretty soon.

He got up from bed before he could think about anything and made his way to the bathroom, he needed a warm shower. As he placed himself in front of the mirror, he looked to the person in front of him. And the only thing that he could see in his own reflection was 'misery'. He didn't like it the least bit. Even if he felt like he was miserable, he could never be able to face the world by telling it he was miserable by his appearance too.

He grabbed his toothpaste (it was Close Up), he brushed his teeth before he shaved, washed his face and jumped to the shower stall after he stripped naked.

Then he took a good bath to face the world today. Okay, maybe half of today since it was already 3 in the afternoon.

---

"Good afternoon, Momoe-san!" Ken greeted sweetly to his dearest grandma.

"Ah, Ken-chan... are you feeling better? Yohji-kun told me how you got a morning headache and needed to rest, I was afraid to wake you up." The old lady gestured as she put her wrinkled warm palm to her oldest grandchild's forehead.

Headache? Oh, Yohji must have lied to her so that she won't be worried, he thought.

"Yeah, but I feel a lot better now. What's cooking?"

"I made you your favorite beef lasagna, I'm still cooking it. It should be ready in a few minutes, why don't you prepare the table? Three of them, please. Yohji-chan is eating with us."

"Whatever you say, Queen." Ken smiled as Momoe-san hit him playfully saying something like 'don't joke around with people older than you!' as she laughed and went back to the kitchen to check out on her delicious lasagna.

Ken was preparing the table when he met Yohji who just watered the green plants inside the Flowershop. Their eyes met, and silence slipped in for awhile before Yohji started to talk.

"Yo, soccer boy. Thought you would stay in bed all day." He mocked.

Ken smiled playfully, "shut up, I'm not in the same level with you."

"Tell me about it."

Then they snickered together. Somehow Ken felt relieved that he was still able to joke around like this with Yohji after he confessed his feelings to him. He really felt relieved.

"Momoe-san said that you're eating with us. Hope you like lasagna." Ken stated as he continued to prepare the table.

Yohji drew himself closer to Ken as he helped him, "I will eat anything except of your cooking."

"Huh?! That was rude!" Ken shot up, still holding blue plates.

"Hey, can't blame me for having such a poor taste in culinary, I'm just stating the truth and the truth itself I'm stating." Yohji grinned very widely. Ken didn't like it and what he didn't like more was that Yohji was right, he was poor in cooking and everybody who had tasted his food knew it too well.

But he had pride, so he kicked Yohji on the leg.

"Ow!" Yohji scowled, "grow up, will you?!"

"Shut up, or you're eating beneath the raining sky." Ken coldly stated as he continued on his work again.

"Whoops. Okay, okay, whatever you say, princess."

"Stop treating me like a girl!"

"Yes, yes."

"And a kid too!"

"Yes, yes, of course."

"Hmph. You ARE impossible."

Yohji grinned more.

As the table was already set, Momoe-san's lasagna was also prepared. She brought the big rectangular lasagna to the table, woo-ed by the boys. She put it down on the table and they had lunch, one of the greatest lunch Ken ever could remembered.

He never felt so relaxed like this in a long time. The only irony was that he felt like this when Omi wasn't around. He felt a little bit guilty, but oh well, the lasagna needed more attention. At least for today he decided to give himself a break.

When they were in the middle of the lunch, suddenly the phone rang.

Yohji was going to get it when Ken was already up and dashed to the phone. He pressed the phone to his ear and greeted, "Koneko no Sumu Ie, can I help you?" (3)

As Momoe-san kept eating and adoring her own cooking, Yohji already put his eyes on Ken. He was feeling a little but of insecure when Ken froze to the phone call and kept his eyes plastered on him. Then he heard Ken replied.

"O-oh, hi Omi!"

Yohji put down his fork and knife.

"No, really! We are having fun, Momoe-san cooked my favorite lasagna and now we're eating. Yohji is also here."

He paused for awhile.

"I s-see, okay then. Don't force yourself if it's impossible, I'll tell Momoe-san about it."

Another pause.

"Okay. Tell Aya that I will hurt him if he doesn't take good care of you kay? Hehe just kidding. Okay, see you tomorrow, bye. Take care." With that, he put the phone on where it belonged and stared at it for a few seconds. Silence was what painted on his lips when suddenly his dearest grandmother broke it off.

"Was it Omi-chan? Is he alright?"

"Y-yeah, it was Omi. He's fine, he said they'll be staying overnight since the rain was getting even more furious up in the mountain and they didn't want to take the risk of forcing themselves to get home. He said not to wait for him tonight, and he also said hi to Yohji."

"Oh those two lover birds! We shouldn't be worried when Aya-kun is around there, should we?"

"Of course not! He's with... Aya."

He felt a silent stab again in his heart but he managed not to let anyone see it, thus Yohji noticed. He tried damn hard to bear Ken's hurt expression. The two of them were going to stay overnight on top of the high mountains, just the two of them, in one room. He didn't even want to imagine. But he couldn't. He knew it too well.

Then suddenly Yohji claimed again, "so are you going to continue eating or not? There's still lots of lasagna here that need to be taken care of."

"Ken-chan, come back and eat some more okay? I've made lots of them."

"S-sure!"

However, he had lost his appetite.

---

Ken was sitting on top of a small hill near the grassy field where children liked to play soccer there. The sky was pretty clear and although the grass was still wet, he liked it like that. He wasn't teaching today but he needed to get some fresh air so he closed up the Flowershop earlier then usual and decided to take a walk. When he realized it, he was already in the field.

He smelt the strong scent of grass and inhaled deeply. He felt a little bit more relaxed then before as he watched the mini boys play.

For some reasons, watching children play the ball became his favorite scenery to watch whenever he felt down. Somehow their smiles and their spirit always became contagious to Ken and he felt that his problems always never too big to comprehend if he saw those children laughing. They were so innocent, so angelic that he adored them so well. He always loved children and soccer more than anything else in his list of hobbies.

"Ken-niichan!" one of the children called out.

"Oi!" Ken replied while waving his hand up.

"Come play with us! I wanna show you the head trick I've learned!"

"Maybe sometime later, Ken-niichan is kinda hurt on the leg so Ken-niichan can't play now."

"Aww... you okay?" the kid with big brown round eyes gestured as he imposed a teacher-like movement, "eat lots and sleep lots, Ken-niichan! Your leg can hurt easily because you're low with calsam, you're old so you have to drink more milk than us. Mommy said that milk got a lot of calsam that's good for our bones!"

/C-calsam?/ Ken thought as he laughed, /he must meant calcium./

"I will remember that, coach. Now go and play more, you don't want to lose, do you?"

"As if!!" and with that, the kid ran off Ken and started playing again. He did some moves in hope that he would get Ken's attention and impressed him, and every time he did that, Ken would always woo-ed him. He was having fun, Ken thought, and he was happy seeing those children having fun in soccer. It was the last thing his father taught him anyways.

"Playing with kids your age, eh Kenken?" came the lazy voice of Yohji.

"Don't you even try, Yotan." Ken replied without letting his eyes go away from those kids.

Yohji placed himself just next to the brunette as he took a deep sip of his cigarette and watched those kids with Ken. Then the soccer player turned his head to Yohji without changing his sitting position at all. "I thought you stopped smoking."

"Well things came up, won't survive with these little fellas."

Ken quirked a smile as he turned away, "tell me about it."

They savored the moment of enjoying the breezy wind, laughter of the children and the strong scent of green grass. Mother nature was calm after the heavy cry, and somehow the two of them felt in ease although there were still some 'things' to be taken care of.

"You know, Yohji." Ken started, still with his eyes on the children.

"Hmm?"

"Maybe I'll confess to Aya."

Yohji turned to Ken, violently. "W-what?"

"But not so he'll stop treating Omi like the way he is right now and be my lover, not on that purpose, you know me better than that."

"Then?"

"Well, maybe it's just my egoism. Just like you." he smiled. Yohji didn't.

"I'll just confess to him to settle up my feelings and end it all right there too. When I'm done, then I can be sincere to actually congrats Omi for having such a cool, cold blooded lover—who is in the same time warm in every single aspects."

Yohji breathed down to calm his arising adrenalin as he made his sitting position comfortable. While he did that, Ken let his hands soared high before he placed the two of them pressed on the back of his head and let himself fell to the slightly wet grass. He could smell it even more than before, and he really liked it.

"Hey Yohji."

"Yeah?"

"It's going to be alright, right?"

The blonde's eyes softened as he replied, "of course it is."

Ken smiled, he knew Yohji was just being nice although the two of them knew it very well that it wasn't going to be as easy as it sounded. But it was something that Ken needed to hear to encourage himself in confessing.

After he confessed, he would feel better. And when he felt better, he could support his own brother to be with his 'lover' more sincere than anytime in his life before. This time he wouldn't be such a hypocrite masochist that he had always been before, this time he could sincerely watch them being happy without any feelings of regret.

On that day, a heart had made another encouraging decision.

/I will confess./

TBC

1) 'chan' is usually used by the Japanese for girls or people younger than the one talking  
2) Yohji's tattoo says "When Are You Gonna Learn?" ...explains everything, doesn't it?  
3) Koneko no Sumu Ie Kitty In The House, the same title with the real Flowershop they used in the anime :D cute, eh?


End file.
